Musings on Things both Fictional and Real - With a Heavy Focus on LE/SS

[northangel27]

Before I get into the endless drivel that is to follow, I wanted to point out two beautiful fanart pieces that touched my heart and soul today. Firstly, from *Allada this beautiful kiriban gift:



In which she has portrayed me and Severus (or Lily and Severus) if you prefer at Spinner's End. Wonderful, and such a balm for my soul this morning, dear *Allada, you have no idea.

Secondly, from =lilyhbp this:



A personal triumph for her, artistically, in my own humble opinion, and a picture made all the sweeter because I know that it has been in the works for months due to issues with her health and her computer. She has literally poured her blood, sweat and tears into this piece and it shows. A better gift for her Muse I cannot imagine!

This just filled me with peace and joy when I saw it, =lilyhbp!

This will be rambling, and not really a true essay of any kind, just something I feel the need to get off of my chest, and is a sort of explanation and apology of a kind, I suppose. As many of you probably know, the pairing that first ushered me into the whole Harry Potter universe, and which partially spawned my love of Severus Snape was Snape/Lily.

How little I realized, when I first entered the fandom directly after Deathly Hallows, what a hated pairing that was among many Snape fans. It didn’t take long for me to find out, however, because that was predominantly what I was writing, and though the majority of the people I have had the joy of meeting in this fandom have been kind, supportive, and polite, even when disagreeing with my point of view or my pairing of choice, there have been a few who seem to be so tied up in Snape’s pain (perhaps because it so much resembles their own) that they seem unable to let things go so lightly.

There is something about SS/LE that seems to set aflame all the long buried pain, all the rejection, all the anger left over from people’s own adolescence. The pain we suffer at that age seems to wound deeply, much more deeply than at any other age, and of course, if we believe that Rowling’s writing is really therapeutic writing (and Deathly Hallows rambled on so, that of all the books, I very much feel that it was just that), then I think it is fair to say that even she was trying to work out some very deep seated pains in her own life through the series, and then trying to put them all to death, one-by-one in that last book.

As many of you know, I started writing “Solace” a couple of months ago just for fun. It was a pairing I never understood (HG/SS), and I wanted to see if I could overcome my own objections to the pairing and see if it was something I could learn to like. And surprise, surprise, I really did start to like them together. I think I can see the draw for fans of that pairing now. Hermione is more like Severus than Lily ever was, or probably ever would have been, Hermione is a bridge of healing between Harry and Severus, and Hermione is far removed from the generation that caused Severus so much pain. She is a fresh start in a way.

There’s something beautiful about that. It is healing for Severus, and for this writer, to have the opportunity to wipe the slate clean, almost, and give Severus this new start. It is a wonderful literary device, and speaks so much of redemption and grace, but in saying all that, I have to say that for me personally it still leaves me a little hollow. Why? Because I think that the thing that is usually missing for me, even in “Solace”, though I tried to address it as much as possible, is the concept of true inner healing. Yes, Severus finds happiness with Hermione, yes he lets his past go (to a certain extent), and begins again, but I rarely see themes of true, deep soul healing occurring HG/SS fics (though oddly I see this often in Snupin fics, perhaps one of the reasons I am extremely fond of that pairing).

Now, I know that not all of my readers will fall into the following category, but I have found that some of the more passionate HG/SS fans seem to have a serious hatred for LE/SS, so I find that since I now have a toe dipped in each pond, as it were, I am recognizing more and more how very much certain people out there despise Lily Evans (these tend to be the same people who virulently despise J.K. Rowling as well, which is interesting to me, even though I haven’t quite decided what the parallel might mean).

Really hateful Lily criticism hurts me, and it always has. It hurts me for a lot of reasons. The first is, that I am one of those people who tries to find the good in every character. ls269 from DeviantArt mentioned that to me the other day. She said that something that she has always noticed about my writing is that there is no good and evil, in the traditional sense, but rather just a million shades of grey. Perhaps that is just a result of being a child of the postmodern age, I don’t know, but I am just wired in such a way that I always try to find some good, something beautiful in everyone, while still fully acknowledging their flaws.

James Potter bashing can be very popular in the LE/SS fandom, but I have always tried to paint a compassionate view of Potter where I can. I actually think I have gotten more strongly expressed, and at times hateful responses from other Snape fans over that than over anything else in my writing, and that hurts too, for reasons I admittedly don’t understand. Perhaps it is just that hatred of any kind hurts me.

I’m a Hufflepuff in a Slytherin and Gryffindor dominated world, and sometimes that is a very hard thing to be. My mother and sister are both Gryffindors, my husband, my best friend and most of my other friends are all Slytherins, and only my father, a Huffleclaw, is someone who I have been able to consistently rely on to view the world in a similar manner to myself.

But all of that to say, that what I have always tried to make my writing about is love, forgiveness, understanding and healing. Those words look really pretty on paper, but actually achieving these things in real life is often a long and horribly painful process. I know this first hand, because not only am I married to a man who is very similar to Severus Snape in regard to the sorts of sufferings he has had to bear in his life, and the way he had, in the past, dealt with (or not dealt with) that pain, but I am also in a relationship with another individual who is, in every way, like Severus. I live in close daily relationship with both of these people, and I watch them interact with me and with one another, and I see the long term damage that their pain and suffering has caused, I see them struggling somedays just to keep their head above water, to take the higher road, to be the better man, to do what they know is right, not just easy. Both of them are truly the strongest and bravest people I have ever known.

Bitterness, and the obsessive and possessive cradling and nurturing of one’s hurts that bitterness tends to cause are two of the hardest things in the world to break free of. I watched my own grandmother destroy her life with bitterness. I watched my husband almost destroy his too, and then just very recently I have had to watch the other dear friend I mention almost do the same. Watching people drown beneath the weight of their hurts is painful to watch, especially if you are empathetic and nurturing by nature. You watch them reach a point where no one can help them anymore. It is hard for me to let go at that point. I want love to heal the world. I believe that love can heal the world, but there is always free will, and sometimes, honestly, people just choose not to take the road of love.

I have always seen Lily Evans as the sort of person, who, as Remus Lupin said to Harry in the film version of “ Prisoner of Azkaban” – “Saw the good in people even when they couldn’t see it in themselves”. Did Rowling do a good job of presenting her as that kind of a character. No. I would say that she definitely did not, but to run the risk of sounding a tad nutty, the characters in her universe are much bigger, much stronger, and much more independent than the meager descriptions we are given by Rowling. Perhaps it is because so many of them tap into common archetypes, I don’t know, but I can honestly say that in all the years that I have been writing fanfic for many different fandoms, I have never written characters who are so very independent, so ready and even eager to move beyond their identities in canon text and reveal to the world who and what they really are.

Severus Snape practically leapt into my lap begging to be written (in a very snarky and stoic way at first mind you ), and anyone who knows Severus Snape knows how strongly he would have to feel about something, and how much courage it would take for him to show enough vulnerability to ‘beg’. Lily has always come through more gently, but I see so much of myself in her that she is easy to write, and this is part of the reason why I think I always tend to fall back on writing SS/LE fics when I am going through a hard time. It is therapeutic writing at its best for me.

Many of you know that I have been going through a very hard time lately. This has mostly involved the friend I mentioned coming to a point where his bitterness and determination to covet and coddle his pain had become so much of an addiction that he was literally destroying his life before my very eyes, and pushing me away in the process. There is nothing worse than seeing someone going down a path you cannot follow, driven on and motivated by their own woundings, woundings which they willingly refuse to heal, and to love them so much, that you don’t know how to let them go, that you watch as they begin to pull down your life with theirs.

You wonder how far you are willing to go, just how much of yourself you are willing to give up in the seemingly unending and futile attempt to love this person unconditionally, to heal their hurts, to save them from themselves. And then one day you wake up and you realize that you don’t even recognize yourself anymore, and it is terrifying.

My friend Lucy (*ls269) has been writing a SS/LE novel for well over a year now, and one of the characters she has developed in her story is ‘boggart Lily’. Lily’s boggart is herself. She is a version of herself that could exist if she continued to pour her whole heart into Severus’ life, and if he remained the broken, bitter boy he was as a teenager. She ends up a broken, bitter, jaded version of herself, because in the end she gave up everything for her love for him, and ended up getting dragged down into the morass of his darkness and bitterness right along with him. She drowned beneath the weight of her own compassionate and empathetic nature. A cautionary tale if I ever read one, and very well depicted too.

I remember the first chapter in which she mentioned this character. I remember sitting in front of my computer, drinking a cup of wild berry tea, and crying into it. I was in the midst of just such a drama with my own friend, and I was losing myself in the process. This sort of struggle between knowing where to draw the line between wanting to love someone unconditionally, and forever, of doing whatever it takes to try and snatch back their soul from their own self-imposed darkness, and having to decide how much of yourself you are willing to lose in the process is a struggle that I believe Lily Evans faced everyday of her life from the age of about 12 until the end of her life. I know this can’t be borne out in canon, and quite honestly I’m not interested in canon debate at this point.

I know how Lily was portrayed in canon, but it’s not the Lily I know, it’s not the Lily I write, and I don’t believe that it was the Lily that Severus knew either (though through writing him, I must say that he does not shy away from some rather honest, and not at all sugar-coated assessments of her failings, especially where her interactions with him were concerned). The Lily I know made the only choice she knew to at the age of 15 (I am having trouble knowing what decision to make in a very similar situation and I am a woman in my thirties, so I can hardly condemn teenage Lily for the decisions she made).

I honestly don’t even know why I am writing all this. I suppose it is a sort of apology in a way. I know that I have been snippy with some people in responses to their comments at both LiveJournal and DeviantArt, and even fanfic.net. I beg your forgiveness. You’ve no idea how raw my heart is at the moment.
I’ve been writing LE/SS fic for therapeutic reasons, more than I ever have before, and naturally, as I have way more watchers from the SS/HG fandom now, I have been getting rather more anti-LE/SS comments than I would have when I was just writing to a LE/SS audience, and when people are bashing characters that are an extension of your own soul, it hurts, and you lash out, and perhaps aren’t as polite or understanding or even as sane as you should be. So again, I apologize if I have offended anyone of late.

But I ask too that you have some patience with me. I understand that LE/SS is definitely not everyone’s cup of tea, but my soul is being poured into each and every word of the LE/SS fic I am producing at the moment, and so negative comments just seem to hurt more, and touch me much more personally than perhaps they should. I’m feeling a bit like Rowling lately, I think. I know that I am getting to the end of things. “The Alchemist” is percolating at the back of my soul, begging to be finished, and I’m terrified, because when it is finished, what then? I honestly think that is one of the reasons I stopped writing that story in the first place. I was terrified to finish it.

That was my first story begun at the behest of the Muse. I think I rather fear that when it is finished he will leave, either out of necessity or choice, and what would my life be without my Muse? I shudder to think of it.

Well, this has probably all been rather more personal information, and endless, pointless drivel than any of you wanted to listen to, but I just needed to get it all out tonight, so if you read through all of this, thanks for listening. I appreciate it more than you will ever know.

Severus Snape Related Fan Art Feature

There are bound to be some repeats here, but I just really felt like doing this. I'm going way back for some of these, and pulling from the depths of my fave folders, and then for others, they are more recent. Enjoy!

*mybreathingselfagain:


=Expell-HUN:


~katigerclaw:


~RosesAndThorns:


=lilyhbp:


~rawenna:


*Vizen:


~firefly-wp:


=Patilda:


~ave-avery:


~cabepfir:


*lilynoelle:


~laerry:


~Umino-aka-Morskaya:

 

And that was just a taste. More in the days to come, I think

.

Comments

[bemoan1000.livejournal.com]

Thanks for sharing. You touch on so much here that I have been feeling about some things. Right now I’m short on time but I hope you don’t mind me coming back to share my opinions.

I have never written characters who are so very independent, so ready and even eager to move beyond their identities in canon text and reveal to the world who and what they really are.

So true. I believe there is more to them than we see in text. And for some characters we don’t know that much about them. I personal I’m tired of the “out of character” “not canon” comments. We all see a character differently and I believe there is no right or wrong. What is important is the essence needs to be there.

I know this can’t be borne out in canon, and quite honestly I’m not interested in canon debate at this point.

Me too. I made a decision few months ago to stay out of those kind of debates. I’ve already worked it out in my mind for my own satisfaction. I’m not out to change anyone’s mind, and I’m personally tired of being told I don’t understand certain things. No. I just see things differently. Granted, if someone saying that Ron has blond hair than I do think canon correction is okay.

About James Potter, I tend to dislike him because most people tend to write him as either evil or totally cool. A guy with no problems in the world. Someone unreal. I would like to read a story that is James centric where his character is developed. But many of the James centric stories seem to have too much Severus hate, which I won’t read. I did start reading a SS/LE fic where James character was human and he was even likable. But Severus and Lily were so annoying I couldn’t continue. Someone did write me a James is human story, which helped.

I also agree aboutDeathly Hallows. I have said many times that I didn’t care for the book, but I am grateful for it. I am grateful for the world JKR has given us, but I do believe that it has gotten too big for her. And I don’t think that is a bad thing. I think the strongest things about JKR are her characters. They seem so real sometimes.

[mimimanderly.livejournal.com]

I don't think you have to worry about your Muse leaving you if you finish. I think that the only way that he would go is if you told him to. I used to worry about that sort of thing, too. At first, my Muse used to tell me, "I will stay for as long as you draw/write me." Now, however, he tells me that he will stay until I tell him to leave. He admits that his previous statement was a ruse to make sure that I didn't give up my artistic pursuits too easily.

I think that you need to be honest with him. Tell him exactly what it is that you fear. And then listen to his response. Give him a chance to assuage your fears.

I haven't been reading as much fan fiction since I began drawing. Now I only have time to read drabble. Before that, I read tons of it, and I was always more fond of someone just making up a character fresh, instead of pairing him with Lily or Hermione. Lily rejected him. Granted, she had reason to, and she was too young to handle his volatile emotions, but I just thought that they were such different people, I couldn't see it working out. Hermione is just too young. I'm at that age when I look at men my age with women young enough to be their daughters, and part of me seethes. Yes, I know that Hermione isn't some young bimbo; she has a brain, yaddayaddayadda. But she is YOUNG, and I can't help but feel sour grapes over that. I don't understand why no one seems to think of pairing Snape with Sinistra. So little is known about her that you could write ANYTHING, and she is most certainly closer to his age.

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

I paired Snape with Sinistra once. In fact he lost his virginity to her. God, that was a fun story to write!

I like Severus with people his age too. I am very fond of Snape/OFC (other female character) fics, if the other woman is interesting enough, and then there is my soft spot for snupin (may it never die!), though I would fail at writing it, I'm sure.

[elethian.livejournal.com]

I don't understand why no one seems to think of pairing Snape with Sinistra. So little is known about her that you could write ANYTHING

People do think of it (see http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=elethian&keyword=severus/sinistra&filter=all for example), but it's definitely a rare pair since Sinistra is little more than a name. It's easier to write a character who has more source material to go on. It's not quite the same bias as against true OCs because Sinistra is mentioned in canon, but it's a lot of the same work, therefore the attendant problems of making them detailed enough, not a Mary Sue, etc.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

We sound like we have had a similar experience of "Potterverse"...I, too, only came into it when Deathly Hallows was released, and so I experienced to story by reading Volumes 1 thru 7 back-to-back.

I wonder if that gives one a different perspective not only on Snape, but Lily and the other characters, too.

I think a lot of the fandom who have been around for at least years, if not from the very beginning, may have gotten too tied up in the years of speculation of "Snape: Evil or Not Evil?", and just accepted the few crumbs of "Liliness" that Rowling provided, where Lily of course comes off as some sort of Madonna-esque saint (the religious icon, not the pop singer, LOL)...

I've found that certain elements of fandom have accepted their own years of building up their own mythologies of the series so that now they are unable to view certain characters objectively.

James Potter was a wonderful person, Lily was very lucky to have married him.

James Potter was a terrible git, Lily made a big mistake in marrying him.

Severus Snape was a wonderful person, but misfortune and bullying turned him into a bitter person.

Severus Snape was an evil, wicked person, obsessed with Lily, and nothing presented in Deathly Hallows changes that "fact".

Most people tend to want to see things in terms of black and white -- it makes it so much easier for them, in that they don't have to really think. Someone or something is "good", or it is "evil"...and never can the twain meet.

I absolutely LOVE your writing just because you DO explore the shades of grey; that is why early on in reading the books I had decided that Snape was my favorite character, just because he IS so complex and not clearly good or evil.

He is human. And just like the rest of us humans, there are things that are good, and there are things that suck in each and every one of our personalities!

I love that you have shown James Potter that way; Lily was supposed to be this wonderful character who saw the best in everyone, yet at first she hated James Potter's guts. Rowling alludes to "something" happening by 7th year that resulted in a change in James' personality, and that change caused Lily to fall in love with him.

But even if someone changes for the better, there are still aspects of their personality that remain. There was "something" about James Potter that made him a better person, yet there still had to be aspects of the bully and the git from earlier years that remained.

You do the same thing with Eileen and Tobias...too many writers present Tobias as a total asshole (I plead guilty to this), yet in some of your writings you have presented a believable relationship between Snape's parents. Hell, I'm sort of using YOU as reference material for later in my own story when I will need to touch on Eileen and Tobias myself (and I WILL give you credit in that chapter!)

Bitterness, and the obsessive and possessive cradling and nurturing of one’s hurts that bitterness tends to cause are two of the hardest things in the world to break free of.

Oh, darlin', truer words have rarely been said!!

I won't go into the long, sad story of my own life and why I know the above statement to be true. Just take it from me that sometimes, no matter how much it hurts, you've just got to walk away. If someone is intent on being "obsessive and possessive cradling and nurturing" one's hurts and bitterness, they end up drowning in the cesspool it creates, and risk taking anyone and everyone who's too close with them.

And you have to be strong enough and brave enough to know that even if you walk away, things may not only NOT get any better for the person you are leaving, they may get worse. Much worse. But the only alternative would have been to sink with them. :(

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

Thanks for your reply :-). I think that the insistence of people to view the world as black and white, has done more harm to this planet than anything else. It really bothers me, and I know that I can never stop it; it seems natural and inbred, but I guess I try to counter that idea a little in my writing.

It is interesting to me, how very strongly people respond to a challenging of their black & white world view, though I am not overly surprised by it. I grew up in an odd sort of religious community, almost like a cult, so know what it looks like when people totally turn themselves over to that sort of world view, and how crazy they can get when something arises to challenge it.

I honored that my portrayal of Toby and Eileen could be inspiring to you. I like it when fandom ideas about characters sort of sprout and grow. It's exciting :-)

Thanks so much for your kind and lengthy response. I found it really encouraging.

[ravenstar84.livejournal.com]

"Most people tend to want to see things in terms of black and white -- it makes it so much easier for them, in that they don't have to really think. Someone or something is "good", or it is "evil"...and never can the twain meet."

That's what I've seen in the debates I've took part in after Deathly Hallows came out. Lily and James were protrayed a this ideal noble and loving couple in the last 6 books, and I think we get that impression because it was how Harry saw them. For me, it was like the couple who were meant to be together, especially in regards to what they did for their son. Snape's memories gave a lil more depth to who Lily was, and possibly the relationship between the 3 of them. After reading Book 7, I got the impression that Severus was sorta the "other man in her life." And it totally changed my perception of Lily and James.

Of course you have people who just want to hang on their own impressions, like the "Snape was evil/Lily and James were the dynamic couple" groupies, or the "Snape was awesome and can do no wrong/Lily was the bitch who did him wrong".

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

Lily and James were protrayed a this ideal noble and loving couple in the last 6 books, and I think we get that impression because it was how Harry saw them. For me, it was like the couple who were meant to be together, especially in regards to what they did for their son. Snape's memories gave a lil more depth to who Lily was, and possibly the relationship between the 3 of them.

And so many of the fandom are fanatical Harry supporters, and refuse to view anything in the books in any other way except thru Harry's viewpoint.

As much as I love Severus, I have to wonder that if in the long run, he and Lily could have really made a go of it at marriage, especially as parents.

After all, how many of the kids you were friends with and pal'd around with when you were ages 9 through 11 do you still keep in contact with today? How many of your friends from high school that you vowed at the time would be your BFF are you lucky enough today to perhaps get a card from every December?

I have a feeling that if both Severus and Lily had survived and HAD gotten married, that they'd end up being divorced before they turned 40. ;-)

[ravenstar84.livejournal.com]

"After all, how many of the kids you were friends with and pal'd around with when you were ages 9 through 11 do you still keep in contact with today? How many of your friends from high school that you vowed at the time would be your BFF are you lucky enough today to perhaps get a card from every December?"

Hey, we got the "One Big Happy Weasley Family" in the end didn't we? XD

The two of them falling out by the time they hit 40 is pretty realistic, but I still think the exact opposite is still possible. And with the HP universe being written the way it is, marriages can stay healthy and last.

In a way, I still think James and Lily were the noble couple that Harry always thought they were. They were two people dedicated to the Order and keeping their family safe afterall. The revelations in Book 7 gave more layers and dynamic to the couple, especially Lily. And I think Harry knows this as well, with the way he acknowledged Severus afterwords. The thing is, I've run into REALLY ecentric Lily/James shippers in the past that just hate the idea of Severus loving Lily. I think it's either they hated Severus' character from the get go, or because Sev loving Lily ruins their impression of the "one true perfect couple". Which then they totally miss one of the biggest points of the books.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

The two of them falling out by the time they hit 40 is pretty realistic, but I still think the exact opposite is still possible. And with the HP universe being written the way it is, marriages can stay healthy and last.

Yes, but the way the HP universe was written, certain people seem to also hold onto emotional baggage long past the time they should have let go.

In some ways, Severus Snape was very needy, specifically regarding Lily. I don't see him changing, even if they had gotten married. I see him as the type that would have constantly demanded to know where she was going, who she was going to be with, who would have pouted when she got back home. She was a very social person who would have enjoyed get-togethers, either in her own house or at someone else's, or meeting friends for a drink at the local pub. Severus would have hated doing all that.

In a way, I still think James and Lily were the noble couple that Harry always thought they were.

No argument there. No matter how obnoxious James was when he was younger, something DID seem to change him for the better by the end.

Too many Snape fans refuse to see James in a good light, but I think Rowling showed something of a pattern in the books: Harry, when he first hears about his parents from the wizarding world, only hears good things about them, especially his father. It is only later that he learns that his father was as much a bully to Snape as Dudley Dursley and Draco Malfoy have been to him.

At least, viewed thru Snape's memories, and Rowling hasn't been too clear on how "truthful" such memories really are...are they skewed by the emotions of the person to whom they belong?

So Harry has an eventual epiphany regarding a man whom he always thought of as almost a saint, who turns out to have had definite flaws.

OTOH, he also ends up with an epiphany regarding Snape, a man presented thru out the series as nothing BUT flawed, but whom Harry eventually discovers was putting his life on the line to protect him, and who had loved his mother.

The thing is, I've run into REALLY ecentric Lily/James shippers in the past that just hate the idea of Severus loving Lily.

Oh, they not only hate the idea, they feel Snape was pathologically obsessed with her and was a stalker! :-/

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

"In some ways, Severus Snape was very needy, specifically regarding Lily. I don't see him changing, even if they had gotten married. I see him as the type that would have constantly demanded to know where she was going, who she was going to be with, who would have pouted when she got back home. She was a very social person who would have enjoyed get-togethers, either in her own house or at someone else's, or meeting friends for a drink at the local pub. Severus would have hated doing all that."

OMG! I am so glad that I am not the only one who thinks that. I think this is one of the reasons that I could never finish "The Alchemist". I started writing that right when I first entered the Harry Potter fandom and my understanding of Severus hadn't solidified yet. The original outcomes and ideas I had for that story just don't seem to have a ring of truth to them anymore given what I now know of Severus, how I see him.

You are so right on with this. There would have been a lot of jealousy, and A LOT of pouting, I'm sure. I think it wouldn't have driven Lily mad, no matter how much she loved him.

Severus had the potential to be a very great man, but as you say he held onto things. Would a marriage to Lily have changed that? Would he have at last found the strength and maturity to move on from the hurts of his past and embrace a new future? I suppose it is possible, but I think it would have taken something akin to a miracle.

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

Severus had the potential to be a very great man, but as you say he held onto things. Would a marriage to Lily have changed that?


I don't think so.

But it DOES open the possibility for an interesting fanfic or two showing Lily and Severus undergoing magickal marriage counseling! LOL

;-)

[ravenstar84.livejournal.com]

"At least, viewed thru Snape's memories, and Rowling hasn't been too clear on how "truthful" such memories really are...are they skewed by the emotions of the person to whom they belong?"

I remember JKR addressing in an interview or some kind of Q&A. It's true, in real life a person's memories are not accurate. They're full of biases from the beholder. But according to JKR, the advantage of a pensieve is that it doesn't keep those biases. So whatever we see in the pensieve is exactly what happened.

I guess the theory could be that it's not so much what the person was feeling or what they think happened that is put in the pensieve(which is why a person's memory is so biased), it's whatever they saw and heard and anything that surrounded what they saw and heard that is stored. Being that this all magic and the memories coming from magical people, I think this makes sense.

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

I remember her saying that too, actually.

[ravenstar84.livejournal.com]

You know, I actually had a couple Snape haters use the whole "memories are flawed argument" against me. There was one time someone used it as an excuse to say Snape lied/was biased and that James may not have been the bully he was.

Some of these guys forget that this is a story. Mind you, I had these debates with people AFTER Book 7 came out. If Snape's memories weren't the truth, why would the author give us this information, let alone without any explanation as to why? It just wouldn't make sense.

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

Yes, from a pure 'author's intent' standpoint, you are right. It wouldn't make sense at all.

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

I actually totally agree with that. Severus had some major issues, and I just don't think that he would have known how to deal with them, and I don't think that Lily would have had the patience to wait for him to. They probably would have turned into a milder version of Severus' parents actually.

Lovely, now I've gone and depressed myself ;-).

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

Oh no! Don't be depressed!!:-o

Hey, so they ended up not married to each other and died instead, so no bleak marriage and subsequent divorce!

Feel better now? ;-)

[lilyevans-snape.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, ever so... ;-)

[majorjune.livejournal.com]

Here, have some strawberry shortcake, it will make you feel better!

;-)

[ravenstar84.livejournal.com]

Awesome awesome post! And I love lilyhbp's work. I haven't checked on her site in a really long time (its another part of the fandom I need to update myself on), but the stuff you've shown here tells me she's still got. :)

You've touched on a few things that I've had issues with as well in regards to certain groups in the fandom. I've probably babbled on this subject before, but Lily bashers have always annoyed me. The excuses I've heard were things like she wasn't there for him enough, or if she had stayed with him he would have turned out better. I don't think I've been in a situation as deep as yours or Lily's, but I have been in a situation where I've had to walk away from a friend because being around them wasn't good for me anymore. And I agree, I think Lily did go through a lot growing up with Severus and made the only choice she knew of at the age of 15. It may not be set in stone according to canon, but I think this is what makes the most sense knowing how frienships can go.

Lily bashers (or HP fans in general from what I've seen) also base their feelings on how Lily isn't portrayed as a good person in the books, so they take that as truth. I'm of the agreement that JKR didn't do a good job in showing us enough of Lily, but I don't that was her fault. The most we see of Lily is Severus' memories, which is only about 5? of them. The purpose of the memories were to tell Harry the truth about himself and the mission, but 5 or so memories can't possibly describe who Lily was to a great extent, let alone her relationship with Severus. Besides, this was Harry's story. There's so much background to all the characters in Harry Potter, but there isn't enough room to tell everything.